Sunday 22 March 2009

10 Dollar

Mind shopping list for myself. Just to note how much electrical bullshit I still need to by. Prices are Amazon prices.
Sekonic lightmeter 258.06
Polarising filter 22.79 (instead of 104, I should maybe use that as an advantage and order soon)
Metz flash gun 321.45
Manfrotto tripod 133.95
and eventually, once I will set up my own lab
Enlarger 546,21 plus all the chemicals/paper and wet stuff that comes with it.
I have no idea how to pay for that.

and I'll do my laundry now to get my mind off things.

Thursday 19 March 2009

The Passenger

yes it's been some time. And today is one of those days. I woke up way too early, don't really have to go into Uni, but I will anyways because there is nothing else to do.

Sunshine outside, but I owe everybody here some updates.
LCC interview was horrible, the two men were really mean, some of what they said: "your work is just a simple excuse to meet people" or "You cannot go on working like this because attendance is a vital part of this course. You have to give 100% when you are studying with us and cannot go on trips around the world all the time. Your attendance has to be there." Bastards. I got in anyways.
By now I don't want to go there any more, Camberwell interview is coming up next week, Westminster the week after. I withdrew my application from London Met, will probably do the same with University of East London, if they ever get back to me.

Right now I feel like life has taken me on a journey of which I don't know the final destination. Camberwell by now is the place where I want to be, but I thought the same about LCC before I had this terrible interview and noticed how less the people there actually care whether I'm one of their students. Matt, one of my tutors, said a good photographer will make the most out of any photography course, no matter how good or bad the ratings are. Sometimes I believe in it, sometimes I don't. Bournemouth did give me a massive load of confidence when it comes to talking about my work and generally making it clear that photography is a profession like any other, yet again, I still have massive doubts. Doubts about not being able to pay back the loans I will have to take starting this September, doubts that London might be the place to be, the unis but just simply too rough, doubts about everything, that staying at home and saving money might be a better idea. But saving money for what? I don't know either to be honest.
I guess I just have to ignore the voices in my head, just like I did before I moved to Bournemouth. I mean in the end, everything turned out right.